Toward a more viable model of grieving and consequences for older persons

Most theories of grieving derive from Sigmund Freud and Erich Lindemann's understanding of mourning and include two assumptions: (a) Grieving is time limited; the process should be completed or resolved after a year or two; and (b) The main task of grieving is to achieve “decathexis.” One should detach oneself from emotional ties to the deceased so as to be able to form new relationships. This study presents evidence that these assumptions are flawed and that modern theories of grieving fall short of explaining the complicated reality of the mourning process. An alternative model is presented arguing that when a “high-grief” death occurs, a griever may be able to adapt and adjust to loss, but the grieving continues indefinitely. Implications of this model for older grievers are explored.